Before Christmas, I was stuck in the curve of failure and the loop of confusion. I couldn’t wrap my head around how I was going to tie everything together. I had different ideas that only loosely connect. Thank God for my alpha reader who has tirelessly read each and every version of this manuscript I’ve pumped out. I can extrapolate what works and what doesn’t by her reactions, and she’s come to know and love the characters, helped name them when their names didn’t feel right.
So here I am, on the cusp of 100,000 words and I’m winding down to the ending. I have a good idea of the direction the story is going to go, but I’ve been surprised before. That’s the best part of immersing yourself into a different world: experiencing the surprising twists and turns of people who exist only on the pages of a story that you’ve written.
When I finish and get this story as polished as I can, I will get a hard copy printed for me as a celebration of my success of completion. I’ve blown past the curves and loops of failure and confusion, made it through the red lights of enemies and rejoiced in the speedbumps of friendship. Sometimes, it helps to know when to pull away and let the creative mind rest.
Home stretch! This weekend is a working weekend; time to hunker down and fall back into the lives of characters I’ve created.
It’s been a while since I’ve last done much with updates here. I have been struggling to put down words for a long time now. Around June, I realized that what I wrote for Nano last April wasn’t good enough. Oh, it was good, but it wasn’t good enough. It didn’t resonate with me. I realized that I had to re-write the entire story, and I did. And I got a good start, but then I realized that I’d written myself into two different rivers that never converged. I also realized that this re-write was a lot better by a landslide.
I had so much more detail! The characters were so much more alive! But they weren’t together. I had a fractured story and every pathway to consolidating it ended in utter failure. I stagnated. I tried Nano this November, and while I did get my 50,000 words, they weren’t GOOD words. They didn’t solve my problem.
I started thinking about how to bring the two main characters together. How to make their pathways form a Y at a central convergence point and still that didn’t work. I stopped writing so much. I started giving up.
In the meantime, I adopted the most precious babies. Two little Bengal kittens named Summer and Winter. They stole my heart. My writing seemed even further away, especially during November. I also started playing World Of Warcraft’s new expansion, Legion.
Life got pretty hectic at work, which meant I was coming home and playing WoW or watching TV or more often than not, playing with the kittens. They’re teeny for only so long. Already, they’ve grown so much!
In the midst of all this, somewhere soon after the expansion launched, I went through one of the Legion storylines, and it was so good that I sat back and said, “I want to evoke emotion like that.”
I desired it, but with everything going on, I forgot about it. We prepared for Christmas, and I put writing aside. I got a new computer for Christmas, and since the girls were now old enough to entertain themselves, I started playing WoW again on my new rig. With kittens bouncing around me (I have to watch them constantly, they’re into everything), I found myself going through the same content I’d gone through before, back in September.
I was once again moved. I realized I wanted to evoke that. At the same time, my ever constant alpha reader, Amber — who reads all of my versions — was telling me how good the re-write was. So in the second week of my vacation, I realized I’d been looking at everything all wrong.
Rather than try to squash what I had written into a newly defined mold, I needed to start over. Mash things around. Break things apart into their elements. Gear up for an epic raid.
In the end, on Friday, I started writing. And in the past few days, I’ve managed to find not only the story I have wanted to tell but the will and the desire to do it. I’ve managed to get down almost 50,000 words in just a few days because I’m excited.
Excitement is a commodity you cannot pay to have, but it is essential to the ingredient of making something that will evoke emotion from someone else. So here I am, managing to go from about 30,000 words to 75,000 words in a handful of days.
I have geared up. I have joined the epic raid of writing proportions to slay the boss, Writer’s Block. And now? I once again fall into the world of my own making to see what happens next.
Because I am excited.
It’s been a long time since I last updated. A lot has happened since then! In the crazy midst of an incredibly hectic work time, I’ve finally found my stride. Not only do I feel it is the right decision to re-write the story, I believe that it will be that much better.
Is it easy to do? No.
Do I want to do it? I didn’t at first, but now that I’m neck deep in re-telling the story, I find it rather thrilling. I’m trying that much harder to take myself on an adventure and live within the world I’m creating. Good or bad – if I can engage myself to where I don’t want to stop writing, then perhaps the readers will be engaged enough to not want to stop reading.
So I’m a quarter to a third into the re-write. I’m clocking in about 7k – 14k words on the weekends. About 1.6k words a day, depending on the day and depending on how busy work is.
I am hoping that this is the last re-write, but who knows what the future will bring. Thus far, the response has been favorable, and I’m excited to continue!